Not Just Health & Fitness
Covering all things health and fitness, but not just health and fitness.
Expanding from the basics to encompass everything under the umbrella of living your best life, while sharing insights into my personal journey along the way.
Not Just Health & Fitness
#7 My Scoliosis and Spinal Fusion Surgery Journey
Originally recorded for The Fuzed Life Podcast. Imagine transforming your life through the power of fitness, not just with dumbbells and protein shakes, but through profound lifestyle changes and mindset shifts. That's exactly what Helena, our guest and an innovative fitness coach, brings to the table. As she shares her journey from spinal fusion surgery to planning her competitive comeback, we're reminded that the path to wellness is as unique as the individuals walking it. From bodybuilders to weekend warriors, Helena's personalized app-driven programs are sculpting more than just bodies; they're reshaping lives with daily habits that stick and mental fortitude that lasts.
The dance floor can be an unforgiving place, especially for someone with a spine that no longer bends. But resilience shines as we recount the story of a dancer who refused to let spinal fusion define their art. Adjusting choreography and embracing core strength, they've pirouetted past pain and limitations, a testament to what's possible with determination and adaptability. This narrative extends to others with similar challenges – martial artists, weightlifters, and everyday heroes – each bracing against their barriers and emerging stronger, inspiring us to reexamine the robust core of our own perseverance.
Wrapping up, we turn the spotlight on the untold tales that bind fitness and mental health, revealing scars as badges of victory over adversity. My own spine surgery saga unfolds, highlighting weight training's pivotal role in my physical and mental recovery. As listeners, you're invited to draw strength from these accounts, seeing parts of your own journey mirrored in the struggles and triumphs shared. Whether you're navigating ADHD in a neurodiverse world or seeking the courage to start anew, this episode stands as an empowering beacon, lighting the way to a healthier, happier self.
See my website for information on my coaching services https://helenaslyfitness.com/coaching-packages/
Connect with me on instagram https://www.instagram.com/helena__sly/
Welcome to the Not Just Health and Fitness podcast with Helena. I'll be talking all things health and fitness, but not just health and fitness. I'm expanding from the basics to encompass everything under the umbrella of living your best life, while sharing insights into my personal journey along the way. Let's get into today's topic.
Speaker 2:Welcome back to the Fuse Life podcast, where I host guests with specialized experience and knowledge in the world of back pain. Today's guest is a women's physique and fitness coach who is 13 years removed from a spinal fusion due to scoliosis. So with that, I introduce Helena. Slide. Helena, how are you doing?
Speaker 1:I'm good. I'm good. How are you doing today?
Speaker 2:I'm doing good. I'm doing good, so what does your business entail? What is a lifestyle and physique coach? Is it like workout programs, diet? What do you do?
Speaker 1:Yeah. So I have an app that my clients can use which gives them their training programs. So they will have personalized training programs from me and that app shows them like a little video of every exercise and they're able to track their progress. So the training side is very much run that way and I also provide nutrition coaching and we work a lot on building a lifestyle that feels good for these things so that the results can be maintainable. So they've got their training, they've got their nutrition program.
Speaker 1:We work on their lifestyle and break down, like their daily habits and really focus on what are the grounding habits that help make all of those things go a little bit better. Is that before you go to bed you're setting things up for the next day? Is that pre-planning your meals? Is that doing some journaling? So we work out what kind of habits really support those things and with a big focus on making it feel good so that they can do it long term rather than it feeling like a punish or something that they have to do, but in making it enjoyable and really empowering them through that process with a lot of mindset work as well.
Speaker 2:Okay. So it's almost kind of like a life coach as well, like there's a lot of things outside of fitness too that you're getting in. Yeah, I would say that I'm sorry, I didn't mean to talk about where you go ahead.
Speaker 1:That's okay, I'd say a lot of my job is less to do with the training and nutrition program and while I'm confident about great training and nutrition programs, so much of my job is about, like behavioral psychology and the ways that we actually apply ourselves to the way that we eat and the way that we train and getting those things done, because anyone can pick up a training or nutrition program or you can even ask chat GPT these days to write you a program. But if you're actually going to do it, you really need to work on the mindsets around why we do things and why we don't do things that we know align with our goals.
Speaker 2:Okay, and your job? Are you getting girls ready for stage, like kind of what you're doing? Are they doing physique contests, or is it just anybody?
Speaker 1:So I have a couple of clients who are in the physique contest sort of arena. So I have some bodybuilding clients. I also have some athletes of different sports. So I've got a few ice skaters on my team like professional figure skaters, and then I've got some general population people that just want to lose that five to 10 kilos, just want to feel better in their bodies again, some mums getting their sort of their new pre-baby body back or whatever that's going to be for them. Now I've had some wedding transformations. So I have quite a broad range of clients. But I tend to attract, like the high achievers who are really sort of stuck in that sort of perfectionist, all or nothing mentality and helping try and break that to have less all or nothing and more just good consistency, and they can be. They can be in any sort of aspect of life really, but in the end of the day that's who I tend to attract, because I guess that's what image I give out online.
Speaker 2:Well good, it sounds like you're helping a lot of people and it looks like you're just killing it on social media, so I am going to put your link in the bio so everybody can get to your IG. Do you have a YouTube or any other social media that I can link there?
Speaker 1:I also do have my own podcast, which I started towards the end of last year, but mostly it's Instagram. I do have a Facebook page, but it kind of just gets the overdraft of what's gone on on an Instagram and I'm not as active in there. I have a YouTube channel, but it's not necessarily something that people want to go watch. That's basically to host all of my training videos that I use in my app. So there's all these videos of me doing exercises, but I'm not like talking to the camera or anything like that. So Instagram is basically where it's at.
Speaker 2:Okay, and are you competing right now or are you on stage?
Speaker 1:No, so I'm in a long off season. My plan is to probably compete again towards the end of 2025. That gives me enough time to spend some time just enjoying training and nutrition for how that feels good for life, not just always being in competition mode and also gives me time to build the muscle that I need to build to make sure that the next time I got to get on stage I look different to the last time. So if we're doing back-to-back shows, you don't necessarily have enough time to make real progress because essentially, how different you look on stage has less to do with that prep, that cut period where we're dieting, and more to do with the time you spend in the off season than a healthy body weight building muscle.
Speaker 2:Gotcha Okay. So you are what? 13, 14 years now we're moving from a spinal fusion.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yes, I had it done when I was 19 years old and I would say it was a really successful surgery for me. I don't think I could be doing the things that I do now if I decided not to have that operation.
Speaker 2:And that's from scoliosis.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I had an S-curve, so about 50 and 52 degrees, I think the two curvatures were, and I also had a rotation in the thoracic and so before surgery I had a lot of discomfort, I was in chronic pain, I had a lot of muscle spasming and I was also my rib cage was twisted so I wasn't able to use my full lung capacity anymore. I was to the point where sort of organs and things are starting to not have the space that they needed, and it was a decision made sort of with my future in mind, that if I ever was going to fall pregnant, that there would be space for baby and also, obviously, to try and get me out of the chronic pain that I was living in. And, like I said, it was really successful for me.
Speaker 2:Good. So how long were you living in pain?
Speaker 1:I got diagnosed with scoliosis when I was 14. And we originally tried to brace me through my teens to try and avoid needing the surgery. So I wore a brace for 20 hours a day for four years and that unfortunately wasn't successful. So that was hard Obviously like being a teenager wearing a full torso spinal brace. Other than the fact that that was very uncomfortable and sore, it also was a little bit isolating as a teenager. I couldn't just sort of run around on the field at lunchtime the same as everybody else.
Speaker 1:When it was P class I got to take it off. Or when I was dancing, because I was dancer at the time, I got to take it off for those things. But I'd have to get it back on and I actually needed somebody to help me put it back on to make sure it was tight enough. So there'd be like two or three girls in the changing room with me trying to like get this brace back on tight enough, and like people used to walk past and like, instead of just saying hey, like they'd kind of knock on my brace and they'd tap on it and because it was obviously this hard thing and I was stuck with this obscenely perfect posture in class where everybody else is latching over their desk, and I'm sitting there straight up like a rod because I had this brace on and it was really uncomfortable and it was not a good time and unfortunately it didn't work in the way that we wanted it to and my scoliosis did still progress to the point where I needed the surgery.
Speaker 2:So you get to 19 and you decide now's time for the fusion.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah. And I'd stopped bracing it around 18 and it got like rapidly worse after the bracing and I was in so much pain and we were talking to, obviously, my surgeon, who I'd been seeing throughout the years on my journey with bracing, and he'd sort of said you know, this doesn't need to be done now. You could do this later in your 20s or 30s, once it gets to a point that you do like really need it. But obviously, at 19, I still lived at home with my mom. I could take time off, you know work to recover. I could have like been living in the environment where I can be supported through that recovery, whereas if I waited until I was in my mid 20s or 30s, other than the fact that it would have been an even bigger operation because it would have been worse, I also wouldn't necessarily have had the lifestyle to make that recovery that little bit easier by living at home with my mom. So, yeah, we just decided it was the way to go and, yeah, it was the right decision.
Speaker 2:I bet it didn't seem like the right decision right after surgery, did it?
Speaker 1:There was definite wonder about what I would be able to do again. I was a dancer at the time and I was also doing karate, and getting back into those was very slow. Obviously it starts right back from in the hospital where I kind of had to learn to walk again and then to the point where when I did start going back to dance classes or karate classes, I just stood back in the back row and did very little versions of the movements to try and recalibrate where my centre of mass was and that sort of proprioceptive awareness that if I stuck both my arms out to the side, you know, I had like one way up high and the other because what used to feel straight didn't feel straight anymore and so I had to kind of relearn where my body was, as in space, as part of that recovery. And I think it was about three months before I was allowed to sort of jump or do anything sort of with any sort of sharp movements. But in saying that, while it felt really slow at the time and I felt very limited and I was still in a fair amount of pain while I was initially recovering, by the time I was a year post-surgery I was back on stage again with dancing.
Speaker 1:I think at the time of the operation I'd set a goal to try and do one dance at the end of the concert. I ended up doing 13 and I was back in the tournament circuit with karate, I think just before a year out from my surgery as well. And while once I got to a year I'm like wow, that recovery was actually quite fast, but along the way it felt so slow and I felt so limited and I was used to being good at things and I felt like I had to just do regression versions of everything. But it absolutely like by the time you get to a year, that time actually flies by and I was out of pain and I was able to do most things at that point and I would definitely say now, at this point, it barely limits me at all.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So that's kind of the same for me. After a year I could do most of the things I could do prior to the surgery. But then I mean, when I got to two years and now at three years, things felt so much better. I remember doing a video at one year and I'm like, guys, I'm like 85, 90%. And then I get to two years and I'm like, no, I wasn't. I was like 65, 70. Now I'm at 85, 90. And it's really amazing that in a year you were back already dancing. Now, does that dancing require you to jump around in dynamic movements?
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So I had to be able to jump, and that's fine, like do leaps across the stage and things like that, and I could do.
Speaker 1:Those things where some of the dancers had to be modified a little bit was just anything that really required spinal flexion or contraction, because I am fused at the end of the day, so I can't arch my back or round my back forward.
Speaker 1:And so there was a couple of movements where something had been put into the choreography that I just couldn't do because I couldn't make that shape with my torso, and so they would either create an A and B group where half the people on stage do one thing and half do the other, or they just slightly change it. So there was a couple of little modifications, but that's literally just down to me being able to arch my back or round it, depending on the movement. Or if I'm, if we're flat on the floor and you're back kind of thing, and you have to sort of roll up. I can't do that, like I can't do crunch type movements, but that's not because of pain, that's just because I've got rods in my spine. So, yeah, small adjustments but overall like no one watching the performance would have been able to tell that anything was different.
Speaker 2:Awesome. And when you say you, you're like you were off when you lifted your arms and everything. That's like you're trying to fit back into a new body. So what was your routine to get to find like your equilibrium? Was it a lot of stretching or what were you doing?
Speaker 1:I basically just started back real slow, like I said earlier, sort of standing in the back row of the class and just doing what I could, and I would be moving slower. And we talked to my surgeon about the fact that, like, would I need to do any specific rehabilitation? And he said, honestly, getting back into dancing because of the core work involved and and things like that, he's like that's probably the best thing that you could do. So I didn't actually have any specific rehab post up, it was just get back to dancing, because there's so much work in sort of holding your core strong and as far as working out where you are in space, like it's a great way to do it. So I didn't have specific rehab, I just went back to what I was doing and slowly work my way back up to to doing it at a level like everybody else. But yeah, there was no real stretching or physio exercises involved.
Speaker 2:Okay, and, and your fuse, from the T two down to the L two right.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So that's like what mid back to lower back.
Speaker 1:It's, it's quite up high. So you've got you, obviously your cervical spine in your neck and then so it's two joints down from from the top of your shoulders and then I've got like three joints at the very bottom of my spine before you go into the sacrum. So I have quite limited movement. That's 12 vertebrae fused and so that's for anybody when meeting it's like 15 inches of fusion.
Speaker 2:So do you have issues? Obviously like you can't round your back right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm stuck with permanently perfect posture is probably the worst side effect.
Speaker 2:So are you anything like adjacent segment disease with the discs that you do have coming out at all?
Speaker 1:No, I've been quite lucky and I would honestly say that the fact that I kept active is the biggest part of that. So, whether it was my dancing, my karate or, in later years, my weight training, I was always doing some work that supported my core strength, and and having that core strength allows me to make sure that those joints are not compromised. And Especially the weight training.
Speaker 1:Learning to brace under a squat, learning to brace through a deadlift, is some of the best work that you can do to support your spine, and while that was a very scary thing to start off in, because a lot of like a lot Of people who've had this kind of surgery or anybody who's lived through chronic back pain, if you're out of pain, the scariest thing is something that might trigger you to fall back in pain, and you hear all these stories about people hurting their back in the squat or in a deadlift.
Speaker 1:But that's obviously done with poor technique, and so I didn't rush into it when I did start weight training, but I would credit my lack of back injuries to the fact that I've kept myself strong. Like the worst thing that you can do for a bad back is stay sedentary, because then it's got no support. So my load doesn't go into my spine, my load goes into my core, supporting muscle musculature From right, from glutes through to core and everything else that supports the spine. So yeah, just keeping strong and active and learning how to brace under load has kept me pain-free.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I think that's something that people need to hear, because I feel like a lot of people get depressed after Having surgery and they do sit around and they do lay around because they don't want to do anything. They don't feel like they can do anything, but staying active is the best thing for you. And what I would ask you is is there anything you do to decompress your spine, like, do you do dead hangs or I mean pull-ups? Probably works for you, but do you use an inversion table, anything like that?
Speaker 1:No, I don't do anything like that, to be honest, and I'm not saying that's not something that people would need to do, or in different journeys, but, like I said, I think the training that I do in general helps support the spine and I don't need to do anything specific for it and Right at the very beginning, obviously, like that would have felt great doing a bit of decompression.
Speaker 1:And you know, the very first month after surgery I bet I had, I basically only got out of bed to go to the bathroom or shower or or have you, so that that first month I definitely was wondering, like, did I make the right choice? You know this is this is very limiting. I think it was a couple of months before I was allowed to drive because it I needed to be able To turn around that little bit to be able to see blind spots and stuff like that and so through all of that it was. It was hard, but essentially as far as my initial call work coming back, like I got back into doing like planks and things like that, but that was generally part of a dance class or part of a karate class anyway. But yeah, and I don't actually do any decompression work for myself.
Speaker 2:That's good. That's good that you don't have to. I do the dead hangs. I had an inversion table before I had the surgery. I haven't gotten one since and what turned me off to that was right before the surgery. So a little bit of backstory at me. So I had disc pain and I had bulging discs ever since I was late teens and I was always able to fix it with an inversion table. And Then toward the end, right before I had surgery, when I'd get on the inversion table it would just fire these electric shocks of my leg to where I wish somebody would cut my leg off, like I. It was so painful and like so debilitating that I I don't even want one of those inversion tables around anymore. Like it really like turned me off to it, but it was a great tool before.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was well, I still had scoliosis. Something like that probably would have felt great. But the bracing kind of elongated my spine for me while I was Pre-surgery for the most part but yeah, I could have hung off things. I'm probably sure it would have felt great anything to sort of lengthen that spine there because it was so compressed. And I guess that's a little bit of the difference too about doing it for the scoliosis versus like bulging discs. I've never really had any actual disc issues, which I'm thankful for. So most of the pain that I dealt with pre-op was muscle spasms because my muscle, my back, was Working so hard to try and keep me standing upright, whereas if I just relaxed I would have been really leaning over to one side. So one side of my back developed a lot more muscle than the other and it was always in spasm and that's where a lot of my pain actually came from.
Speaker 2:Okay, and you had your fusion at 19. So I had mine when I was 33 and so I can tell you I was before the surgery I was depressed, like I did not want to do anything. I couldn't do anything, I could just lay there. And I had one night before the surgery where I was thinking like I'm not gonna be able to throw a football with my kids anymore. I cried almost all night right, like, and that was just like maybe a week before the surgery and that kind of snapped me out of it. But once I had the surgery I was positive from day one, like I'm like I can get back. I know I can get back. I just needed a positive outcome from the surgery. So I'm curious with you being so young, like I know, if I was 19 I got I would have been way more emotional, irrational, like I'm curious to hear how you dealt with Like depression and and your mental health during this time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was less depressed about the surgery itself. I was definitely worried about what I'd be able to do and my identity as a dancer. That felt like it was something that I was gonna potentially have to let go of and that was hard at that age. But I was in so much pain beforehand that I was desperate for For the surgery to go ahead.
Speaker 1:Being in chronic pain through my teens was definitely hard on my mental health and also, you know, in the brace I felt quite different to other kids. I was not diagnosed with ADHD as a kid, but I got diagnosed recently and so I Already felt kind of different and didn't know why. And then I walk around with this like body brace on in chronic pain and then also just the body image piece of knowing that I looked a bit different to other girls. Being a teen, you're already so self-critical as your body goes through changes. But my waist looked quite different on one side to the other. I had one side of my waist that had quite a sharp waist and then the other side was straight up and down. My rib cage was narrow on one side and wide on the other side, and I also had a lean across to one side a little bit and so I was always just trying to hide my body. As a teen and as far as like the normal body dysmorphia of being scared of getting fat or whatever else that is normal for, unfortunately, normal for teenage girls I was also, like you know, watching my body change through puberty, watching my body change as it Was deformed and I kind of took on that word, was like I have a deformity, and that made me feel, you know, very self-critical and really impacted my confidence. And so once I could have the surgery and I felt like I looked more quote-unquote normal, that really helped with that side of it and obviously, getting myself out of chronic pain really helped with my mental health as well, and I had mental health struggles regardless from other areas. I was recently diagnosed with bipolar and that makes a lot of my 20s make sense, but I always have had I probably even if it wasn't for my back, I would have had some struggles with mental health through my teens but it was definitely hard and I was not very nice to myself a lot of the time pre-op and Watching myself go through that recovery and get back on stage and get back to karate and Seeing myself do things that I didn't believe that I could Was actually really good for me and my mental health. So in that way, the surgery once again was a success.
Speaker 1:But I put a lot down to. I was determined as heck to live normally I not just be a victim to it. Because when I was looking for inspiration pre-op, I was looking for videos of the actual surgery, because I'm a little bit weird like that and I wanted to see exactly what was going to go on. But I was also looking for people who had maybe logged about their experience and, to be honest, all I could find was people's talking about like then a negative view or their their victim mindset, and I was like I don't be like that. I'm sure that this surgery has some positive outcomes. I'm sure that there's some people doing some amazing things, and I found a couple little things.
Speaker 1:But there wasn't many people talking about a good life post-op and that made it hard to feel like I was making the right decision. But I had a little determination inside me. Be like well, maybe I can do it a little bit different and maybe I can be the inspiration for somebody else Later on, and so I'm so glad that you've invited me on here and the fact that you're running this, this podcast, to be able to give positive stories to people who are maybe gonna have to undergo this surgery because there just wasn't much and there was so much victim Like mindset around, that everybody's experience like nah, it doesn't need to be that way, like this is actually pretty cool. You can go through something like this and live normally, or beyond normally afterwards.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and that's why I do this is because, for the exact same reason, I couldn't find anything on YouTube that wasn't negative. Everything was negative. Everything I researched was negative. Oh, you'll never be able to work out, never be able to play basketball, like everything. Anything you researched no, don't do it. It's basically get the surgery and then just hang out for the rest of your life until you die.
Speaker 2:And I was like no, I need to do like an in the moment, real video. And if you watch my first video, it's it's like 25 minutes long. It's stupid, it's me rambling and it's the video of mine that has the most like views. Like it's over 100,000 views. I never, ever, dreamed it would be anything like that. And I get emails and comments and stuff about how it's helped people and it's yeah, that's why we're doing this, because people need to hear your 13 plus years after a fusion, you're doing fine, you're doing all kinds of activities, you're running your own business. These are things people need to see, because people go into this deep depression and they just never get out of it. People get on these pain pills. They never get they. Just it just completely ruins people. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it's unfortunate, and some people do obviously still have a lot of pain post surgery. Not everybody's surgeries is successful of mine, so I definitely wouldn't want to like victim blame people who are still struggling afterwards, but I do see a lot of people just sort of using it as their excuse or a bit of a crutch. You know, I can't do that because I have a bad back. I can't do that because I've had a spinal fusion, especially when it comes to weight training, which I'm so passionate about it being one of the best things that you can do. And I'd said earlier like I was pretty scared when I first started, but I also just had this thing. I was like if I can get everything around my spine strong, there's not as much load on my spine when I just bend down to pick up the remote off the coffee table and put my back out or whatever, and because that's where a lot of these back injuries happen is just doing basic stuff around the house. But if you can deadlift your own body weight or you can squat with your own body weight on your back, you can do all those things so much easier and out of pain and it really does help take load away from your spine when the musculature surrounding it is strong, but 100% there. There needs to be more good stories, and I share it on my Instagram every now and then. I used to do more than I do now because, honestly, sometimes I completely forget that it's a thing for me, like it's so well recovered that I forget about it until somebody mentions my scar or and still like something prompts me to be like, oh, I should probably mention that again because I haven't for a while. But whenever I share on my scoliosis surgery, there is so many people kind of like yourself, that message through and say you know, thank you so much for sharing a positive experience.
Speaker 1:Post-op, or people who have maybe daughters who are about to go and have the surgery often reach out to me and are asking you know, can you give me some positive message to be able to give to my daughter, because she's about to go undergo this surgery and she's really scared and I've showed her your page and all the things that you're doing and she's really inspired by it and I do. I think I should share on it more often, because there are quite a large portion of my followers who have jumped onto my page because of the fact that I've shared about it on occasion and I've got one post that I shared recently talking about, you know, the type of squat that I hoped to be able to do post-surgery. It's maybe like a goblet squat, holding a kettlebell or a dumbbell in front of me and being able to squat with that. But the type of squat I truly can do post-surgery is with my body weight or more on my back, with a barbell, full depth, no limitation. And while I had the goal to be able to do the smaller version or the regressed version, I also didn't let that goal be limiting to me and I just let myself try things and slowly I built that strength and I've absolutely surpassed all the goals that I thought I would have for myself. Pray up, that's also like as a dancer. Like I said before, I did all those dances at the end of your concert.
Speaker 1:As a karate, I achieved my black belt and right up to my second day in karate post-op I think, I was a brown belt when I went to into my surgery.
Speaker 1:So I got my black belt. I competed as an international karate car over in the UK and in Japan and I wasn't limited and I've always competed in bodybuilding shows. Now it's like there is nothing that I have been able to, nothing that I've gone to do that I was limited by unless I need to lie on the ground and do crunches, because that's basically the only thing I can't do and if people have seen me and my training I still have, I still can get a six pack, provided and lead enough. You don't have to do crunches to be able to strengthen your core that way. But being able to brace on the heavy load and any sort of other movements that are going to brace your core can still develop that muscular too. So people don't need to have a view of what you can't do just because you can't do crunches, in regards to achieving your dream body as well.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, sometimes you just need to change how you work out and it's amazing what you can achieve with the building blocks method. With me, after the spinal fusion, it was just you don't know you can do something until you do it for the first time. They're like, oh, that wasn't that bad. Oh, that wasn't that bad, maybe I can do this. I mean, sometimes you have to lay in bed for the whole next day because you're so sore, because you're just using these muscles again. But yeah, it's amazing that you were back competing after this and it's your entire story is amazing.
Speaker 2:It's what people need to hear, because I, although I do get some positive feedback, I get people that are so negative and they blame everything, either on the surgery, on their doctor, on the things they can't do. I get trolls all the time telling me you're so stupid for getting a fusion. I mean it's, you've been on social media, right, I mean you get it. But people just need to hear the positive message and I'm so glad to have you on for that. One thing I did want to ask you about was your scar. Is it like to the point where it's barely noticeable?
Speaker 1:Yeah, and do you know what I actually miss it being more visible.
Speaker 1:So it was obviously quite red and pinky purple for the first couple of years, but now a lot of the time it's not that visible, except for in certain lighting. But on occasion when I'm training, because I film my workouts pretty much every day and put them into my stories, on occasion it's from a back angle and the lighting catches it and I might have somebody ask about it. But I love if somebody notices and says, oh my gosh, what's that scar from? And I obviously get that a lot less now because it's actually healed really beautifully. It's barely visible, which was what I felt like I wanted at the beginning, when it was really visible and I was a little bit shy or a little bit like concerned with how it was going to look because I was so conscious. But now I'm like, oh gosh, I actually wish it was more visible because I'm so proud of that scar and what that represents for me and what part of my story that tells that I kind of wish it was a little pinker, to be honest.
Speaker 2:That's awesome, it's. You wear it like a badge of honor, right.
Speaker 1:Absolutely.
Speaker 2:So is there anything that you can tell like has definitely changed in your personality after the surgery? And let me give you an example. Like for me I Wouldn't have done this before the surgery like little insecurities, caring about what people say about me, that type of stuff, all that stuff for me is completely gone. Like I could give a crap what you say about me. Like I it's almost like my life is. I have one life before the surgery, one life after. Like you figure out what really matters and All the other crap it just you just push it to the side. Was there anything like that with you?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I definitely think it really helped on the confidence piece, not only because I then looked better than than pre-op, but also in going like, look what I've done, you know, and so, little by little as I, as I healed from surgery, I definitely had a lot more confidence in who I was as a person and what kind of determination and grit I have, just by taking that little by little by little approach, because little by little, a little makes a lot. But I I also Got a lot out of being able to go like I can inspire others with this and I was debilitatingly shy pre-op, and Having a story that I could tell or knowing that I could do something that would inspire others Really helped with my confidence and help pull me out of that. That shyness and I was also a lot Kind of to myself. On the body image piece now, like getting stronger and seeing myself be able to do things that I couldn't do before Made me so appreciative of what my body can do that it made it feel silly to be so like self-deprecating or to Be unkind to myself about how my body looked when I'm like but look what it has done, look what I can do with this body.
Speaker 1:It feels so silly to be Like self-conscious about how your legs look when you realize that your body has gone through a journey like this and you know, at one point you were a bedbound for a month. At one point you had all of your spine and ribs all broken up and put back together. It feels so silly to be self-conscious about being a couple of kilos heavier than you want to be when you like, but look what the heck my body can do. And it really that really comes down to like brings in my why, when it comes to training, I always want to be able and I always want to be, you know, as independent as possible.
Speaker 1:As I get older and I know that if I let myself go and I stop training and I stop trying to prioritize that lifestyle, I am in a position where my bottom three joints will start taking all the load and I there's a very real possibility that if I lived a sedentary lifestyle, that I could end up in a wheelchair later on, because those bottom joints, once they go like, they take it all the load and so I'm like I want to be able forever and you know I don't need to be so self-conscious about what it looks like, because Look what it can do, and I think that was a big part of it Is that, when you fell in love with fitness and weight training, was it like thinking about your future?
Speaker 2:or why did you decide to Start this business? You know, I know you just explained you want to keep those joints, you want to keep the muscles around nice and strong, to protect those joints. But is that the reason where you said I'm gonna start weight training like crazy, or what sparked this?
Speaker 1:So the weight training was something that I'd always liked the idea of but sort of hadn't really just Worked out how to had incorporate that into my life. But my reason for starting weight training was actually because I was getting ready for my one of my black belt Greatings and I was. I wanted to get stronger and I couldn't really find a coach who Specialized in karate with weight training and I didn't want to just go and weight train and get strong in ways that weren't going to help my karate, and so because I felt like there's a little bit of a gap in the market, that's actually what made me go and do my own training for that. And then, along the way, while I was weight training and improving my karate, when I was at the gym, quite a few times I had people asking me what show I was prepping for, because I was gaining muscle and I was there with assuming I was a bikini or a fitness competitor and After I'd had a few different people mention that to me. That kind of sparked the idea that if people think I'm doing this, then maybe I've got, maybe I've got the goods to be able to do this, and Then I ended up pursuing that journey, the coach that I had at the time. He did prep people for stage and so I spoke to him about it and he's like, yeah, let's do it. And so I kind of morphed over the next couple years away from karate and into bodybuilding and that was just sort of like this changing journey and now I love the bodybuilding piece. I love weight training. I love what that does for people.
Speaker 1:Even so, my mom is one of my clients. She's been my client. After five years. She was like my test dummy to start with, but she started weight training at 58 years old. She's now 63 and she's the strongest she's ever been in her life. Once again, like most 60 year olds are living with back pain. She has arthritis, hips, knees, ankles but with weight training she's been able to reduce a lot of her arthritic pain and Improve her ability to move around. She can get up off the floor without her hands All these sorts of things that start to deteriorate While you're getting older and I think my passion for being able to move independently as I get older I rubbed off on her and when you compare her to any of her siblings like she's so much more able and, as her daughter, it's really nice to see her really confident and moving really well and and know that if she does have a fall she's lost a lot less risk of hurting herself, which becomes a thing through 60s and 70s.
Speaker 1:And so I've been able to help other people take on the mindset of training for your ability as you age, rather than just training for aesthetics, because it can be kind of hard to go. The only reason why you want to go and train is because you want to change how you look. But if you have a deeper why of wanting to be able to sustain good movement and independence, you know, just to be able to get yourself on and off the toilet. That's why a lot of people end up going into aged care, because they don't have enough strength to lift themselves up against gravity. But if you, you know if you're weight training, you can avoid that and you can maintain your independence a lot longer. And so, yeah, I'm quite passionate about moving well as you age and weight training has really done that for me.
Speaker 2:Gotcha and Tell me about the podcast. Is it based on fitness or?
Speaker 1:Yeah, so my new it's. It's fairly new, so I only started it in, uh, december, but it's called not just health and fitness, so there's a health and fitness theme to it. But I also want to talk, you know, not just about training and nutrition, but the mindset pieces and the lifestyle pieces and things that I'm learning I plan to at some point share on my scoliosis journey. I talk about mental health quite a lot because I'm quite an advocate for better conversations around mental health, and so I share my journey on that as well. And recently I just did a little series of like affirmations for people you can listen to it as far as improving body image, or there is another one like on financial health or just on, like, having a good day, and so I'd done some affirmation series.
Speaker 1:As recently and yesterday I did an interview with a client oh well, sorry, a fellow coach who specializes in body image and relationship with food, and so, yeah, it's called not just health and fitness and I'm really excited to see it grow this year. It's something that I had a lot of imposter syndrome starting, and I'm sure you're the same when you started yours like who's going to listen to this? But at the end of the day, I'm like people listen to me talk on my stories every day. Why not give them some, like longer form Pieces that they can listen to or things that I can refer my clients to, rather than telling them the same thing over and over again, like, oh, I'm talking about this on my podcast episodes. Listen to that, and that should be able to help expound of your journey, sort of thing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, I have a little bit of that imposter syndrome, but for me it's like I know I'm not going to make millions off youtube podcasting, right, but people are going to be helped by this and I know they are because they send me messages. So I actually enjoy talking to you. I enjoy hearing people's Uh journeys and sharing that with other people. So, yeah, I I think part of it is just knowing who I am. You know, like this is the reason I'm doing it. You know and I know I'm super amateur and I don't care, so it just is what it is. So where can we find your podcast?
Speaker 1:So it's actually on all major platforms on Apple and Spotify, etc. On my Instagram I have a link to it, which is usually how most people find it, or I mentioned in my stories when I post a new one. But yeah, on all my major platforms it's called not just health and fitness.
Speaker 2:Awesome. Do you have guests, or is it just you?
Speaker 1:So most of my episodes so far have been just myself, but I have two episodes with guests. One of them I just recorded yesterday and so that'll actually be going uploaded tonight, and I do plan on doing more guest episodes along the way, interviewing some of my clients about that journey. So people have like a real person's journey because they look at me and they go yeah, but you're a bodybuilder, yeah, but you're working this. You know you work in that space, you have that privilege. But when I can share a journey of somebody who's just like your average Jane and she just wanted to lose that five or six kilos and what that journey has been like, I think those sorts of interviews can be really helpful for people. So I want to be able to share some like real life stories along the way, as well as being quite real and raw about the things that I struggle with on my journey, because I've got this Drive from the point where so many people see Somebody else who has achieved what they want to achieve and they almost put them up on a pedestal and think you know, they don't have the same problems that I do, they don't have the same struggles that I do and that's why they've been able to achieve that. But if I can show that like, hey, I actually have these major struggles with mental health or hey, I've had to recover from this major operation or whatever else might come up in my life, that makes it hard to do the thing. If somebody else has that same problem and they can see that I've done it anyway, that gives them hope that they can too, and so I'm a lot of.
Speaker 1:My drive for what I share on Instagram and what I share on my podcast is, once again, just like you is wanting to be able to help people. I don't care if I end up with an enormous following or not, that really doesn't matter to me, but the messages I get when I share something a bit real and raw about people saying thank you, that's been able to help me have a better discussion with somebody else in my family, or thank you, that's given me hope that I can too, I'm like that is what it's all worth, because there's definitely gonna be people who don't receive what I do positively. That is just part of life and, to be honest, I'm really quite lucky. I get, I get, I have beautiful following and I've been very lucky with the community that I've created, that I have a lot of support.
Speaker 1:But there's gonna be some people who are put off by it or think you know what, why she's starting a podcast. You know who she to do that. I don't care, because if, as soon as I get a message from somebody to say that something has helped them, I mean I don't. I don't mind if only five people see that, because One of them is helped by it, and if it does happen to go out to hundreds or thousands of people, amazing. But I'm just. I want to be able to make an impact to someone Is the main thing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and you know what I? I put my email address in my YouTube comments when people ask and they email me, and I've had people ask for my phone number. I've taken calls with people cry, balling, crying, saying they're gonna kill themselves, saying I helped them from killing themselves. So that, right, there is worth it. I mean these people, they just want to talk to somebody else that's felt the same pain that they felt or can help them through. A Lot of people need to see a path, they need to have a guide, because they can't figure it out themselves or they don't want to figure it out themselves. So, yeah, I mean, if you email me, I answer your emails. You know I spend a lot of time on this. I spend way more time on this than money, I may put it that way. So, yeah, that's what it's about for me. It's definitely sounds like that's what's about for you as well, so that's awesome.
Speaker 1:Yeah, my inbox is. My inbox is on. Instagram is where most people reach out to me and, yeah, definitely there's. Especially when I share real and raw about the mental health sides of things. There are people just so grateful and it's not just a quick message to be like, oh hey, like thanks for sharing that that really helped. Like people will send me paragraphs about how it's impacted them and then you know, I try not to take that on as a responsibility, because that can also, that can be too too much, but also like being able to just go like, well, it's not my responsibility to help people, it is my drive to help people and if, as long as that's where my content is coming from, it's a desire to help and not just a desire to get a bunch of followers because I could, I could, I could get a whole lot Of followers if I just did more shoots in my bikini and if I shared more karate stuff.
Speaker 1:That that following part is is Huge, but when I'm just trying to help people on their journey, it's not going to reach as many people, but I think it's going to be more effective to the people that it can reach.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you're a hundred percent right, and tell me about the, the ADHD. Is that something that kind of helps you lock in for your podcast and like Really meticulous about the details for like working out, or is it something that doesn't really help that?
Speaker 1:So I had a bit of a. It comes from both sides really. I think there's a lot of pros to an ADHD brain and that I, once I got diagnosed, was able to see. So when I wasn't diagnosed, I was quite self-judgmental about why can't I just do these things, these little things that other people can do so easily. I knew I was intelligent, but I just felt I couldn't apply myself to do my homework or to get assignments turned in on time and things like that.
Speaker 1:But it also really realized once being diagnosed and learning more about ADHD is that if I'm actually interested in something, I have an ability to hyper focus on that to a level that a neurotypical brain can't, and my whole business and the way I run my business is very ADHD friendly and Also I have capacity to change things that I want to, depending on what's interesting to me most of the time or what's inspiring Most of the time. And so working for myself has actually been really positive since getting my diagnosis, because I did always struggle in in other job roles when I was just being told this is the way we do it, because that's the way it's done. I'm like my creative brain was like but we could do it this other way, it'd be more efficient, or we could do it this other way and it's gonna work better. And I really struggled to just do things the way that they're supposed to do, because that's the way they've been done, and I didn't really realize why I had such a like an aversion to want to just do things that way.
Speaker 1:But it, once I got diagnosed once again, I really understood it and it definitely helps the creativity. It helps me like think outside the box. It helps me come up with different sorts of solutions for my clients. It helps me just, I guess, have the like how hard can it be? Kind of thought when it comes to starting a podcast or starting your own business. I'm like, well, if I'm passionate about it, I'm gonna make it work, because that's the way my brain works and so there's a lot of benefits to ADHD. I am medicated for it and that helps with with the focus as well. But, yeah, I actually really love the way that my brain helps me run my business.
Speaker 2:Good yeah, I figured it was gonna be that way too, so I want to wrap up with you, but there was a question I had to ask you. So I seen on your story that you were eating kangaroo meat. So is that something? Is that like a delicacy, or is that something that's mass produced?
Speaker 1:It is mass produced. It's not super common as in like, not every household in Australia is gonna be eating kangaroo a lot of the fitness community do, because it's such a lean source of meat and so it's more common through the bodybuilders. But it's. It's a slightly cheaper source of meat than, say, beef and it's also Like a little bit more ethically farmed. But mostly I just eat it because I think it's tasty and because it's a really lean source of meat and yeah, I really enjoy it actually. But if you ever come to us like give it a try, it's a little bit it's a game meat so it does have that sort of gamey flavor. But I generally have it in like kangaroo burgers or, you know, in a marinated kangaroo steak or something like that. But yeah, it's, it's not super common. It's probably not as common as as most people would would think, unless you're in the fitness community.
Speaker 2:Gotcha Okay. So it'd be kind of like bison or something over here in the States it's. It's kind of a. It is mass produced but it's not. There's not like farms for like. There's not kangaroo farms, Is there I?
Speaker 1:Don't think so. No, in some areas they're. They're considered pests because they're so overrun, so like in some ways, like they, they are able to remove them but still obviously use them rather than just culling for the sake of culling. But I don't think there's kangaroo farms, no.
Speaker 2:Okay, enough about Australia. So I think you are a huge inspiration and when I go on Instagram and I type in like spinal fusion, usually the women I see is scoliosis. A lot of times it's young girls on there and I think them finding your content, whether it's through this, whether they find on Instagram. I think that's gonna be a plus for them. So, really, I had time. I'm glad you could find the time to come on and nobody got a 16 hour difference, so if we're finding the time, I know you're super busy, but I really appreciate it, helena.
Speaker 1:No, I appreciate you having me and thank you for saying, you know, such kind words, because I really do. It's safe. It's that young girl that I was before surgery that's. That's the person that I want to be able to inspire.
Speaker 2:Well, good, hopefully this gets your message out there and we'll wrap up with that.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much.
Speaker 2:Thank you, talk to you later.
